Tag: how to help a depressed friend

5 Things NOT to Say to Someone Struggling With Depression

I was recently interviewed for an article over at:

…about what to say and what NOT to say to a friend/family member/co-worker who is struggling with depression. I love being a part of these kinds of articles because it really gives me a chance to air my annoyances out loud! And someone is actually listening!

Anyway, the article is actually really helpful – giving lots of ideas about how to approach someone who is feeling depressed. My favorite useless (and potentially harmful) piece of advice that’s often given to depressed folks?

ick.

and here’s why I don’t like it:

A similar piece of advice is to focus on the positives and be grateful. “These are pretty good ideas in general, but for someone struggling with mental illness, hanging a motivational poster in their room, and starting a gratitude journal isn’t going to cut it,” said Stephanie Smith, PsyD., a psychologist in private practice in Erie, Colo. “In fact, trivializing depression by assuming that a clever-sounding phrase can cure it, can do much more harm than good.”

Check out the entire article (including advice from one of my favorite psychologists, Dr. Deb Serani) here:

How to Help a Depressed Friend

So many of us have been there: watching a family member or friend spiral into a pit of depression, addiction or anxiety.  It’s tough to watch, and even tougher to know how to help.  It can be tempting to either:

  • ignore them
  • tell them what to do and get mad when they don’t do it
  • talk to our other friends and family members about them

It’s clear to see that none of these options are useful, but not so clear to see what is.

Here’s where the American Psychological Association‘s newest YouTube video comes in.  The third in a series of the same weirdly-pill-shaped-characters, I think this spot is my favorite yet.  It tells the story of Clara, a spunky cat-loving-race-walker, who is concerned about her friend Tom.  He has had some trouble at work and has recently taken up drinking and sleepless nights.  Clara wants to help Tom, but isn’t sure how.  She tries a couple of tactics (see above, with the addition of involving his mother) and after some failures, slamming of doors, and screeching cats, she succeeds in helping him find professional assistance (with a Dr. Smith nonetheless!).

It can be hard to make psychology funny (for psychologists anyway). So I especially love the light-hearted and funny tone of this really informative clip.  Check it out: